I have been seriously slacking in the blogging department. Maybe because when I started this blog I thought it would be mostly about the funny things that we deal with when trying to blend a family. Or maybe because I didn’t think things would turn out like they are.
After having had 2 step-weekends in a row and working out of town for 50+ hours a week, I was soooo looking forward to spending some quality time with King this past weekend. We planned our whole weekend and even though alot of it included regular old errands (finish our baby registry, get a hair cut, etc.) we were both excited about it. We went to a nice dinner on Friday night and had just gotten home when King received a frantic call from his ex-MIL.
This weekend was the X’s weekend but Happy had texted ex-MIL asking her to please please please come pick her up because her mom was drunk again and she was scared. Ex-MIL and ex-FIL are apparently fighting with X and she told them she would not give them the girls if they came to pick them up. Apparently she was more than willing to give them to King for whatever reason so at 11pm he gets out of bed to go get them. By the time he gets back it’s 1am (X lives 1 hour away) and I wake up to him making them something to eat before bed since she didn’t bother to give them dinner.
Once he is back in bed he tells me that ex-MIL had been covering for X for a long time. She has gone to pick up or drop off or visit the girls, only to find X passed out on the lawn or locked in her bedroom with the girls sitting in front of the tv. She said ex-FIL got into a huge argument with X in which he called her an unfit mother and an alcoholic. Ex-MIL then tells King that she wants him to take custody of the girls or to help her get custody so that they are not with their mother any more.
Right now, the plan is to take temporary custody of Happy since she is the only one currently living with ex-MIL and then go for the other girls in X’s care. A friend of mine works in Child Protective Services and told us that we need to start making a police report every time she is passed out drunk with her kids in her home so that her alcoholism is documented since alcoholism is so hard to prove. King is going to try and have a conversation with X, but assuming she is a mentally unstable alcoholic it will be interesting to see the results of this discussion.
On Monday Ex-MIL called King again to discuss an action plan. King told her that she needs to start calling CPS on X when she knows something is going on and filing a police report and ex-MIL agreed to comply. At least in this manner, X will be somewhat kept in check and there will be documented proof of her neglect.
Ex-MIL also told King that there is never any food in X’s house and that Grumpy goes around picking up all the wine bottles herself because there are so many. She also told King that X has been calling Happy fat, telling her she can’t have cake, etc. because she is too fat. Now Happy is a little overweight, but in my opinion that is X’s fault. She doesn’t have her in any activities and only feeds them junk food when she does decide to feed them.
This breaks my heart. How can someone be so cruel to their own children? What kind of person is this? I couldn’t imagine treating my children this way. Between ex-MIL and the SD’s all covering for X, King and I only knew what they were telling us since we only have them every other weekend. Now that everything is coming to light, King and I can’t justify not pursuing custody at this point. I suppose we should have suspected she had gotten worse considering that lately even Dopey, who used to always cry for her mother, doesn’t want to go back home at the end of the weekend.
The plan right now is to take custody of Happy after this school year (she is staying with ex-MIL at the moment and don’t want her to change schools again). After that we will need a strategy to get Dopey and Grumpy out of there, but we are taking it one step at a time.